The Escape Journals

Traveling In Long Distance Relationships

Loving someone across time zones: the calls, the doubts, and what it takes to keep a connection alive while you chase the world.

Featured Stories

The Hardest Thing I’ve Ever Done

Krista

Traveling with my partner has been absolutely amazing. We share the same interests (except for the fact that he enjoys drinking and I don’t), we have similar levels of patience when it comes to traveling, and we’re drawn to the same destinations. Without him, I wouldn’t be nearly as experienced in travel as I am today. He’s the reason I got my passport in the first place, and he continues to motivate me when it comes to exploring the world.

Moving across an ocean away from him has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I love our relationship so much that I don’t want to lose it because of the distance. Not having him around has made me feel completely depressed, and I know he’s struggling just as much. We deeply miss the physical presence of each other—the simple joy of being together and sharing experiences. Staying motivated is extremely difficult, so doing little thoughtful things for each other and maintaining consistent communication is crucial.

The time difference is a killer and can really disrupt the flow of the relationship. Having a serious and mature conversation about whether the relationship can survive and whether you’re both happy is essential. The best thing you can do is try, and if it doesn’t work out, then something has to give or change. Communication and understanding are key. Sometimes, stepping back to gain perspective can help you understand your partner’s feelings better.

Every relationship is different, and long-distance situations come with unique challenges. First and foremost, it’s important to talk openly about each other’s needs and what would make things easier for both of you. If your partner isn’t meeting your needs, let them know, and vice versa. It’s crucial to keep putting effort into the relationship while pursuing what you love.

Long-distance relationships are incredibly hard, but if the relationship is worth it to both of you, you’ll need to adapt and accommodate each other’s lives. For me, the most difficult part is that we currently have no plan or end date to the distance. This uncertainty makes us anxious, as it feels like our paths might never align again. Having honest conversations about timelines and future plans is critical.

Unfortunately, when I moved, I didn’t discuss the future with him or involve him in the decision. I expected him to accept my relocation without being part of it, and this has been a significant source of strain. Please make sure to involve your significant other in these kinds of decisions and discussions from the start. It has taken us a while to recover from this, and it could have had a much better outcome if we’d handled it differently. Communication and mutual understanding are key. Listen to each other, and make sure you truly understand.

I’d Do It All Over Again

Justin

My long-distance relationship was both beautiful and challenging. I loved being in an incredible relationship with someone from a completely different culture and background. Despite our differences, we had so much in common, and we got to experience each other’s countries and share some truly world-class adventures together. On the flip side, as the visa departure date approached and we had to prepare for time apart, it was incredibly sad and difficult to face the separation.

Thankfully, technology came to the rescue! We talked every day, working around time differences and busy schedules to stay connected and keep the flame alive. There were times when things felt more frustrating than usual, or we’d have minor arguments, but those moments ultimately came down to communication—which is key in any relationship. Without strong communication, every relationship faces challenges. Unfortunately, poor communication was what ultimately ended that relationship for me. Many lessons were learned through that experience, but I’d do it all over again.

If you meet someone who truly matters to you, it doesn’t matter where they’re from. And if one of you decides to go traveling alone, the same principles of staying connected and supporting each other apply. Use the time apart as an opportunity to grow individually. When you’re together again, you’ll both have gained a bit of savoir-faire and grown stronger for it.

Growing in Different Directions

Maguie

It depends on the relationship. From what I’ve heard and experienced, people have different needs in relationships. In my opinion, that’s the biggest factor in determining whether you’ll struggle with your partner staying behind or not. Some people have long-distance relationships for years, while others break up after just one month apart.

In my view, changing the circumstances in a relationship usually leads to growth. And even if the relationship crumbles because of this change, you might be glad you found out sooner rather than later. If you can survive a crisis together, you’ll come out of it stronger than before.

When I traveled solo for the first time, my boyfriend stayed behind, and our relationship didn’t survive. I grew a lot, while he stagnated at home. Or maybe we just moved in different directions—however you want to see it. It didn’t work out. But in the end, you never really know why it failed. Maybe it would have ended even if I had stayed in the same place. But I do know that if you really want to do something, your partner should support you in fulfilling your dreams, and you should work things out together.

Signs that it will work include trust, communication, and respect. Trust in making the right decisions, communicating about everything important, and respecting each other as individuals with your own needs. But of course, there’s more to it than that. It’s hard to give a definitive answer to this question because every relationship is different.

My Heart on a Leash

Josh

Since I knew I wanted to travel, I always kept my heart and feelings on a leash. I didn’t want to get too close to people, and funnily enough, telling girls that I intended to go away for a year usually put them off. No idea why that is, ha. But I knew that if I were to find someone, my plans might change. I decided to stay resolute in my decision to travel, and past girlfriends didn’t appreciate that I wasn’t willing to change plans that had been years in the making for them. I do understand why people think you’d change those plans if you found “the one.” So, either I’m broken in some way, or I just haven’t found the right person yet.

Traveling without a partner is essentially the same as any solo venture. Try not to be afraid of change—let it take you to new places.

Let everything happen to you. Beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final.

Distance Made Us Stronger

Katie

Remarkably easy. I don’t say this to diminish those who are in fulfilling and committed relationships with someone they deeply care about. I, too, was in a relationship with a remarkable woman when I traveled abroad for the first time. We had been dating for close to a year, the majority of which was spent in a long-distance relationship spanning halfway across the United States. That experience certainly prepared us for what was to come.

Even so, I fully embraced the opportunity to step into new lands, which eased any worries I might have had about leaving my partner at home. Say what you will about this sounding selfish, but I firmly believe traveling is, at its core, a selfish endeavor—a journey to find one’s sense of self and purpose.

The six weeks I spent in the cultural hub of Fes, Morocco, hardly left room in my mind to dwell on thoughts of home or my girlfriend. I knew, deep down, that she wanted me to fully experience my surroundings and make the most of this incredible opportunity. Most of my time in Morocco wasn’t even devoted to studying Arabic. Instead, my classmates and I immersed ourselves in visceral experiences—wandering the cobblestone streets, playing soccer with locals, and haggling over trinkets with merchants. But I digress.

My girlfriend understood these facets of my daily life abroad, and we spoke roughly once or twice a week over FaceTime. I made a point to keep texting to a minimum because I valued meaningful communication. My advice? Make every conversation with your significant other count. Set a designated time each week to talk so both of you can fully live in the moment without being consumed by technology.

In hindsight, I believe those six weeks apart actually strengthened our relationship—something akin to the idea that distance makes the heart grow fonder. Here are a few signs that your relationship can thrive during time apart.

Mutual Respect for Space: You’re in a picturesque, once-in-a-lifetime location—embrace it. Trust me, there will be plenty of time to recount every detail of your adventure when you return home.

Enjoying the Journey Independently: Relish the time apart and make memories that last a lifetime. Travel is about personal growth, and being selfish in this sense is not a bad thing. This doesn’t mean disregarding or disrespecting your partner. Instead, it means fully immersing yourself in the experience before you.

My parting advice? Soak in every smell, sound, and scene on your own terms. Never let a relationship hold you back from exploring the unknown. A truly supportive and loving partner will encourage you to seize the opportunity and make the most of your journey.

A Ski Jumper and a Pilot

Connor

My girlfriend is a Team Canada ski jumper and often travels abroad to compete or train. I’m also studying to be a pilot and have to move hours away from home for my studies. It’s hard not to see her, but we base our relationship on communication, always talking and seeing each other, even if it’s just on FaceTime. You can usually tell if something isn’t going to work; it’s a gut feeling you have to pay attention to. However, if you care about your partner enough, and they feel the same, you will find a way to make it work! My advice is to always emphasize communication, so that if you’re feeling tough emotions about the distance, you can talk them through instead of letting them linger.

Eighteen Months, Three Visits

Sian

I think the key is to be open and transparent about what you’re doing and to trust each other. Communication is essential—try to talk at least once a day and keep them updated about what’s going on in your life. At the same time, don’t stress if you don’t hear from them immediately. They might be on a trip or in a place with no signal.

Avoid being overly needy or pushy, as that can strain the relationship and turn it toxic. Nick and I were apart for 18 months, and during that time, we saw each other only three times for a month at a time. We made it work by setting up a schedule—we spoke on our commutes, kept each other informed about what we were doing and who we were meeting, and made time for one another.

As long as you prioritize the other person and give them the time and attention they deserve, you’ll be okay!

Never Part on Bad Terms

Anthony

In my experience, traveling for long periods of time away from a committed partner is challenging, but doable. Communication before leaving, while you are away, and even when you return is key. Make sure there is a mutual understanding about why you are leaving and the expectations for your continued relationship. In today’s world, a big question couples often face is whether they’re allowed to be sexually expressive with other people. It’s important to determine where you stand on this matter and realize it’s okay not to compromise on that stance. Above all, never part on bad terms, as it can destroy the experience you’re seeking abroad.

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Get on the Same Page

Carola

This depends so much on the understanding between two people. Every relationship is different. The longest trip I took without my boyfriend at the time was one month. He was a traveler himself and understood my urge to explore, so it worked because he was genuinely excited for me.

While traveling solo, I’ve met people in open relationships. For longer journeys, I suppose that might make things easier—if that’s an option both partners are comfortable with. On the other hand, I’ve also seen relationships fall apart when one person traveled solo.

What’s most important is ensuring you’re both on the same page. Have an honest conversation about boundaries and expectations before embarking on your journey.

Better Than Not Going at All

Mick

Traveling in a relationship, however, can be challenging. Missing your partner can keep you from fully immersing yourself in the journey. You might find yourself constantly imagining what it would be like if your partner were with you, or wishing you were back home with them. That said, it’s still better to travel without your partner than not to travel at all.

Don’t Ghost Them on Vacation

Mahta

I’ve only had one long-distance relationship, and luckily, it worked. I think this was because we both committed to visiting each other once a month or traveling somewhere together to spend quality time. When it comes to traveling in a relationship, I believe you and your partner should both be open and honest. In my case, my significant other has never stopped me or disagreed with any trip I wanted to make, and vice versa.

There were times when both of us wished the other could have joined, but due to circumstances, we did some trips separately while still keeping the other person positive. I think signs of long-distance relationships that don’t work are jealousy, dishonesty, and a lack of communication. I truly believe communication is the foundation of a strong relationship.

The best advice I can give about traveling without your partner is to remember that sometimes it’s necessary to do things on your own, and it will make you appreciate the time you have together even more. Also, keep communicating and make sure to include your partner in your experiences. Just because you’re on vacation doesn’t mean you should disappear or ghost them.

You Don’t Want My Advice

Thomas

Sometimes it’s just better to say: “You don’t want my advice on that topic, haha.” I tried a long-distance relationship, but I struggled with my lack of consistency and my inability to show that I care, which, to be honest, is partly due to my nature as a guy. Sorry, guys, but it’s true.

Without Trust, There’s No Relationship

Patricia

Traveling in a relationship was very challenging for me. I left for a month to visit family, and my boyfriend stayed home. I had mixed feelings about leaving. I was excited to see my family but sad about leaving him. When you spend most of your time with one person, it makes letting go very hard. It didn’t help that I had little to no Wi-Fi some days, so our communication was terrible. He was very hesitant to share how he felt about me leaving for a month because he knew I was going to see family and didn’t want to seem selfish. During the time I was away, I noticed he felt strange and alone. The distance definitely made our relationship rocky, and this is where trust plays a huge role. I’m an overthinker, and often, I freak myself out for no reason. So, for those who are traveling without their partner, I would say the best way to stay calm and keep the relationship strong is communication. Building a solid foundation from day one also helps keep the romance alive, and without trust, there’s no relationship.

If They Want to, They Will

Chanel

My partner at the time was much more traveled than I am and has traveled overseas multiple times while I stayed back home. Distance is always hard, but simply put, if someone wants to be with you, they will put in the effort, even when they’re far away. I never felt uncomfortable or stressed while my partner traveled because he always keeps me informed, and I’m aware of when he will be without service or away from his phone for periods of time. I don’t think it’s right to expect your partner to maintain communication with you 24/7—they are traveling for a reason, so let them fulfill that while keeping you in the loop when it makes sense.

Time Alone Brings You Closer

Alanna

I have never traveled while in a relationship, but I imagine I will continue to travel throughout my life, even when I’m eventually in a relationship and have a family. Solo travel is so important to me, and I know there will be times I want to travel alone, without my partner. I think it’s important for your partner to understand this and be supportive of it—and vice versa. To grow as individuals, I truly believe we need to spend time alone. In the end, I think this will bring you closer to your partner.

It Can Make or Break You

Grace

Traveling in a relationship without your partner is really hard. Of course, it depends on the length of time you’ll be separated and whether the relationship is worth the effort that a long-distance relationship requires. It can truly make or break the relationship, depending on trust and how much communication you need from one another. I think if your partner isn’t understanding of your desire to leave, and your lifestyles don’t align, then that’s probably a sign it won’t work out.

Thirty Days Apart

Anais

Sooo, I’ve actually never taken a long trip outside the US with a significant other; I’ve always traveled either alone or with my sibling. But I can’t imagine it being totally terrible! For my trip to Europe, my boyfriend stayed in Miami for work. It was the first time we were going to be apart for a full 30 days, but honestly, it wasn’t too bad. The time difference was a little annoying, but that was the only real downside. Since he isn’t very jealous and we’d only been dating for a couple of months, he wasn’t too clingy, which made things easier. 😊.

A Pact Worth Keeping

Min

I can’t speak much on this from personal experience, but I want to share a story that stuck with me. While staying overnight in a hostel in Iceland, I met a really cool girl who had just hitched her way through South Iceland with her backpack. She was AWESOME. We hit it off immediately and bonded so quickly that we even ended up crashing a bachelor party together.

Imagine my surprise when she told me she was happily married to a super-handsome husband. They have this amazing pact: once a year or so, they each pack up, take a week or two, and travel solo to a place they’ve always wanted to explore. It’s their way of doing their own thing while still staying connected.

That story gave me so much hope—hope that you can maintain your independence, continue growing as an individual, and still come back stronger in your relationship.

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